The title of Bond 25 couldn’t be more apt. In a world where we find ourselves in COVID19 lockdown mode. Has some mad power crazed villain, stroking his pussy (phanar phanar!), got his mitts on a Coronavirus that’ll put us out of operation for the foreseeable future? Will Daniel Craig's final mission, prove to be the most accurate of them all? Stranger than fiction? Maybe.
I expect you to reincarnate! No Time to Die will be Daniel’s fifth outing a 007. Making him the longest holder of the role. Taking over from ‘Carry On 007’ killer eyebrow actor, Roger Moore. So where does Daniel rate on the league table of Bonds? For me the list goes like this…
Sean – the original & best.
Daniel – blonde blue-eyed reboot.
Pierce – Oirish with a bit of the above.
George – Aussie model, one hit wonder.
Roger – Sid James in a tux.
Timothy – Wardrobes are better actors.
Oh! Oh! Seven? So, who’s going to step into James Bond’s handmade Crockett & Jones shoes for Bond 26? Or will they be crystal-embellished, metallic leather, sling-backs by Aquazzura? Will James transition to Jayne? It’ll be the beginning of the end for me. Part of Bond’s charm is that he had a licence not to be ‘right on’. He always had a plinth set aside at the Natural History Museum, alongside other dinosaurs. Will Goldfinger’s crotch-aimed laser finally do its dastardly work?
No denying Daniel! I definitely approve of what Daniel’s done with the part. Returning to the truth of the Fleming novels, Craig’s Bond is a cold-blooded ‘bar-steward’ with an Assassin’s granite heart. Sean brought that killer to life in the 60s and Daniel’s taken up that mantle brilliantly. Unfortunately, we had to endure a ‘Carry On Spying’ detour along the way. I don’t recall Bond sporting a f***ing safari suit in Fleming’s original, For Your Eyes Only!
No Time to quit! Daniel is reported to be getting an eye-popping twenty-five big ones (US Dollars), for his last stab at 007. To say it’s been plain sailing would be a lie. Danny Boyle, the acclaimed director of Trainspotting, 28 Days Later and Slumdog Millionaire, spectacularly jumped ship. A set unintentionally exploded, just before Daniel did a similar thing to his ankle. Ouch! Putting the filming schedule on ice, before a Chinese pandemic called COVID19, decided to put its own dates in everyone’s diaries. The World is Buggered? (Possible Title for Bond 26 perhaps?)
When Barbara Saw Daniel. Cubby Broccoli the legendary Bond producer, had handed over producing duties to his daughter, Barbara in 1990. She’d been tracking Daniel for years. She first got an inkling that Daniel could be the next JB, when he played a Papal assassin in Elizabeth (1998). The role called for Craig to drown an informant in the sea. Instead he chose to dash his head on the rocks, long after the director said cut. Deadly Daniel was born. Dashed NOT Drowned Mr Craig?
Brosnan to Craig? Pierce had done a pretty good job. He looked the part. Dark, deadly, slightly camp but much more believable than Lazenby, Moore and Dalton. Die Another Day had grossed $400 million at the box office. But it did have Madonna as a slightly butch fencing instructor and an awful CGI kite-surfing sequence, which was quite frankly, laughable. More Basildon Bond than James Bond!
007 is a numbers game. Casting Daniel as Bond has been a game changer for the franchise. Besides grossing a mind-blowing three BILLION dollars US, he’s brought something new to what Sean started way back in ‘62. Under Daniel’s stewardship Bond has felt real emotion, both joy and loss. Got his tear ducts working, as well as what he’s packing in his impeccably tailored swim shorts. A licence to kill, thrill and spill.
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