Trying to make sense of the car crash that is 2020, is a tricky business. Which is why conspiracy theories are born. From a laboratory manufactured bioweapon to tracker vaccines, that know what you had for breakfast. One man’s conspiracy theory is a trillion men’s misinformation. Clutching at straws is what human beings do, when our world is in meltdown. In writing this piece I do not wish to trivialise the gravity of the situation we find ourselves in. The very nature of Social Media and the light speed a rumour, falsehood or fabrication, can whizz around the globe is frightening. I sincerely urge you to stay safe by continuing to practice good hygiene and physical distancing. As well as avoiding public gatherings and by isolating yourself, if need be. It’s a tough call but these are tough times. So, in no particular order here are some of the more colourful Coronavirus conspiracies that are nuttier than Secret Squirrel doo-doo. First, as I’ve already mentioned, features a swarthy ...

Whether 'tis nobler in the ballot box to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous unpopularity. Or to take up arms against a pandemic of troubles.  And by opposing end them. W oe is the fate of Trump’s Disunited States of America, that the stark reality of digging modern day plague pits would be required to achieve herd immunity from COVID19. Of course, this would mean the most vulnerable amongst us, would frequently receive a visit from G. Reaper for months, possibly years. For everyone to contract the virus, a lot of people will have to die before the upside of herd immunity would be seen. In the States, Corona fatalities are nearing 170,000. That figure would be a drop in the ocean if herd immunity was allowed to run its course.  So, what is herd immunity?  It is the point where most of the population, (figures vary between 60% to 90%), become immune to the virus either by being infected and recovering from the disease or by vaccination against it. This theory has ...

Yes, we’ve all had to   get used to being frightened to death by switching on the six o’clock news for the latest Coronavirus death toll. But like Eric Idle jauntily warbling on the cross, let’s take five minutes to look on the bright side of COVID19. E ver since a new   and novel strain of Coronavirus emerged from the wet markets of Wuhan, our world has been put on hold. We and all those close to us, now live under the fear of death. COVID19 will go down in history, alongside those other decimating deceases, Spanish Flu and the Black Death. But how can we take any positives   from COVID19 when schools are being closed, people are being laid off, hoarding is rife, staying home is the norm and hospitals are overwhelmed with the sick and the dying? The uncomfortable truth is, a global pandemic was always going to happen. The World Health Organisation has been warning governments for years but they simply chose not to listen. Although any death is a death too many , in the c...

The world has a choice, develop herd immunity and let COVID19 run its course. Leaving the world with a massive body count. With few escaping the loss of a friend or a family member. OR… The human race searches for the 21 st  Century holy grail. A vaccine, that can be distributed on a massive scale to save a significant amount of humanity. Obviously, the latter is more attractive, so how are we doing on our quest? The race for a COVID19 vaccine is on! I better kick off with a word of caution, the development of a safe vaccine for a new illness like COVID19, can take up to 18 months to get to us. That’s with accelerated approval and research moving at unprecedented speed. Saying that, the first COVID-cure-off-the-rank, of course looks like coming from China. This vaccine is being developed by two giant Chinese pharmaceutical companies and it has just completed a second phase of testing. They say it might be ready to go to market by the end of 2020, which is astonishing. In fact,...

The U.S. now holds the world record for the highest number of its citizens infected by COVID19. If there was a podium at the Olympic Coronavirus Games, President Donald would be standing atop of the tree, proudly taking the applause of a huge, imaginary crowd of his supporters. (Not unlike his phantom inauguration throng!) His view is that America’s 1.5 million cases, together with a staggering 92,000 deaths, is some sort of spiky red ‘BADGE OF HONOUR’? Spinning is winning! Like an expert spin doctor, President Donald tried to explain his country’s Coronavirus record. ‘You know when you say that we lead in cases, that's because we have more testing than anybody else. So, when we have a lot of cases, I don't look at that as a bad thing. I look at that as, in a certain respect, as being a good thing because it means our testing is much better.' Duh! According to an Oxford University scientific publication, the U.S. lags globally behind other countries in testing, on a per cap...

A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum was a Broadway musical,(1962) and a Hollywood film,(1966).  Inspired by the farces of Ancient Rome’s equivalent of Woody Allen, a playwright called Plautus (251-183 BC). His bawdy tale tells of a slave and his attempt to win freedom by helping his master woo the girl next door. Using puns, slapstick, mistaken identity and satire he comments on the social classes of the time. I wonder what old Plautus would’ve made of the deadly farce entitled ‘A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to COVID19’, we all find ourselves playing a bit part in? Who can we blame? The current Coronavirus pandemic has made us all a tad jumpy. A desperate search for answers has spread across continents, wanting to uncover the reasons for what’s turned our routine-filled lives, upside down. Finger-pointing headlines like ‘Yellow Peril’, ‘Chinese Panda-monium!’ and ‘China kids stay home’, have appeared in newspapers around the world. Our lives might...

Alexander the Fruitcake? In the race to be the craziest world leader, you'd have thought Donald Trump, Boris Johnson and Kim Jong-un would be front runners. Well think again. President Alexander Lukashenko of Belarussia is currently romping away with the title. When every other country is closing borders, outlawing sporting events and mass gatherings, while practicing social distancing, President Lukashenko vigorously refutes any Coronavirus information, as gross misinformation. Corona Ice Capades? Alexander’s favourite sport is ice hockey. He recently played in front of a crowd of 1000s. Interviewed afterwards he said, ‘There are no viruses here! You haven’t seen them flying around, have you? He believes winter sports work particularly well against COVID19. ‘This is a fridge. Sport, particularly on ice, that’s the best actual anti-virus remedy.’ A Vodka a Day... Alexander’s prescription for his fellow Belarusians is to drink 50ml of vodka a day. He’s co...

You Still Alive and Kicking? I checked in with my precious older sister Esme and my brother-in-law Ray last night. It was morning in Blighty and evening in Oz. And guess what popped into the conversation? The friggin’ Black Death! Like the rest of the world, I didn’t see COVID19 coming. Or for that matter, the Black Death being a topic of conversation for my elderly, kith and kin to happily chat about! Obviously, being in their late 70s and early 80s, they didn’t actually remember first-hand the bubonic plague but it was a surreal experience non-the-less. 'Which is worse, Coronavirus or the plague?' Search me? I was just phoning to see if you were alright! They’re both in the sweet-spot, demographic for the virus to have its evil way, so you can understand my concern. A Short History of Virus. As a life-long student of history, it got me thinking about the similarities between the two. Both spread rapidly between countries around the globe, catching governmen...